Weekend Mailbag - 17 November 2006
Friday, November 17, 2006
Hey, look who we found out back digging through the rubbish bins! It's Brian, back from the dead. Let's dust him off with a few questions from the mailbag. Who knows, if he gets through this unscathed, he might actually start posting something of interest on this website again. As always, these are actual questions from actual readers...
Daniyal in Chu, Kazakhstan: Hello. I hope you like very much read this mail. I can say, we Kazakh peoples much happiness with new film by famous television star, Borat. But today, our Kazakh football team were slaughtered like daughters touched by different family in place of romance. What will world think of Kazakh peoples without very success and making World Cup? Thank you.
Brian: Daniyal, it's great to hear from you. Welcome to the internet, and welcome to Bookable Offense. Please come visit us anytime. We've been down with the Kazakhs ever since Nabby's rookie season. People here in U.S. and A. are very interested in your country thanks to your ambassador of peace, Borat. High five!
Unfortunately, your Kazakh football team must feel like they got kicked in the khrum after this week's loss to the Portuguese. While there's really no shame in losing to Portugal, your country has two points after five games, and has only managed to score one goal. While apparently it's ok to score with one's own sister in your country, perhaps you should encourage your forwards to try scoring in the opponent's goal.
If there is one silver lining, I don't think you need to worry so much about the world's perception of your country if your football team does not make Euro 2008. We already have a wonderful view on all things Kazakh thanks to our friend Borat. Chenquieh!
Chester in Longford Mills, Ontario, Canada: Hey guys! Unbelievable finish to the MLS Cup Final, eh? But what I am thinking aboot is the upcoming MLS expansion draft. Who would you take if you were running Toronto FC?
Brian: Chester, I'm sorry you didn't catch Bryce's turn with the mailbag since most regular readers know my thoughts on MLS these days. I will say that the MLS Cup Final was quite a riveting contest. Everyone loves extra time goals. Nice to see the former San Jose Earthquakes win title number 3.
It's also encouraging to find a person actually excited about professional football coming to Canada. Since you took the time to write, I'm humor you with a thoughtful response.
Toronto FC is allowed to take one player from each team. Not accounting for that mettlesome salary cap, here's who I would take: C.J. Brown (Chicago), Matt Taylor (Chivas), Jordan Harvey (Colorado), Ezra Hendrickson (Columbus), Greg Vanney (Dallas), Nick Rimando (DC), Craig Waibel (Houston), Tyson Wahl (Kansas City), Paolo Nagamura (Los Angeles), Daniel Hernandez (New England), Chris Henderson (New York), and Andy Williams (Salt Lake).
Peter in St. Pete, FL: What was the most surprising result this week in the international fixtures? I can't believe Germany was held to a draw by friggin Cyprus!
Brian: Friendlies don't matter. I've been saying it for years, and no one will listen. Germany only could muster a draw against lowly Cyprus. Big deal. The German team won't even get together again until February and doesn't have a competitive match until the end of March. So what happens on a random Wednesday in November does not matter. Ask me again in March.
Stacy in Memphis, TN: Hi, my question is for Brian (We met at that wild Playboy party). I know what a big England supporter you are, and I was just wondering what you thought of Wednesday's friendly in Holland after their two previous disappointing. And Brian, call me....
Brian: These kinds of emails make me blush. Stacy, it was lovely meeting you and I'm glad you found me here on the web. Seldom does one meet such a lovely lady at a party who is double jointed and can talk football. I hope you made it back to Memphis in one piece.
Again, I don't put much stock in friendlies. But we learned a few things from England's draw with Holland. First, 4-3-3 does not suit the English. It never has, and it never will. What McClaren is trying to do is beyond me. 3-5-2 against the Croats, and now 4-3-3? Don't change your formation to match your opponent. Stick with what the English do best, the 4-4-2, and make them adapt to you. Second, it's evident that there's something wrong with Frank Lampard when he puts on the England shirt these days. I don't know if he's pressing too much, or perhaps he's being exposed without Makelele behind him, but he's been woeful for England in the past year. Third, don't screw around with the defense! Put four in the back - any four, really, since English defenders are the best in the world - and go with it. Last, without any dynamic dribblers in midfield, England must use speed to overcome that deficiency.
Photos courtesy smh.com.au and yahoo.com. Send in your questions to bookableoffense@gmail.com.
Daniyal in Chu, Kazakhstan: Hello. I hope you like very much read this mail. I can say, we Kazakh peoples much happiness with new film by famous television star, Borat. But today, our Kazakh football team were slaughtered like daughters touched by different family in place of romance. What will world think of Kazakh peoples without very success and making World Cup? Thank you.
Brian: Daniyal, it's great to hear from you. Welcome to the internet, and welcome to Bookable Offense. Please come visit us anytime. We've been down with the Kazakhs ever since Nabby's rookie season. People here in U.S. and A. are very interested in your country thanks to your ambassador of peace, Borat. High five!
Unfortunately, your Kazakh football team must feel like they got kicked in the khrum after this week's loss to the Portuguese. While there's really no shame in losing to Portugal, your country has two points after five games, and has only managed to score one goal. While apparently it's ok to score with one's own sister in your country, perhaps you should encourage your forwards to try scoring in the opponent's goal.
If there is one silver lining, I don't think you need to worry so much about the world's perception of your country if your football team does not make Euro 2008. We already have a wonderful view on all things Kazakh thanks to our friend Borat. Chenquieh!
Chester in Longford Mills, Ontario, Canada: Hey guys! Unbelievable finish to the MLS Cup Final, eh? But what I am thinking aboot is the upcoming MLS expansion draft. Who would you take if you were running Toronto FC?
Brian: Chester, I'm sorry you didn't catch Bryce's turn with the mailbag since most regular readers know my thoughts on MLS these days. I will say that the MLS Cup Final was quite a riveting contest. Everyone loves extra time goals. Nice to see the former San Jose Earthquakes win title number 3.
It's also encouraging to find a person actually excited about professional football coming to Canada. Since you took the time to write, I'm humor you with a thoughtful response.
Toronto FC is allowed to take one player from each team. Not accounting for that mettlesome salary cap, here's who I would take: C.J. Brown (Chicago), Matt Taylor (Chivas), Jordan Harvey (Colorado), Ezra Hendrickson (Columbus), Greg Vanney (Dallas), Nick Rimando (DC), Craig Waibel (Houston), Tyson Wahl (Kansas City), Paolo Nagamura (Los Angeles), Daniel Hernandez (New England), Chris Henderson (New York), and Andy Williams (Salt Lake).
Peter in St. Pete, FL: What was the most surprising result this week in the international fixtures? I can't believe Germany was held to a draw by friggin Cyprus!
Brian: Friendlies don't matter. I've been saying it for years, and no one will listen. Germany only could muster a draw against lowly Cyprus. Big deal. The German team won't even get together again until February and doesn't have a competitive match until the end of March. So what happens on a random Wednesday in November does not matter. Ask me again in March.
Stacy in Memphis, TN: Hi, my question is for Brian (We met at that wild Playboy party). I know what a big England supporter you are, and I was just wondering what you thought of Wednesday's friendly in Holland after their two previous disappointing. And Brian, call me....
Brian: These kinds of emails make me blush. Stacy, it was lovely meeting you and I'm glad you found me here on the web. Seldom does one meet such a lovely lady at a party who is double jointed and can talk football. I hope you made it back to Memphis in one piece.
Again, I don't put much stock in friendlies. But we learned a few things from England's draw with Holland. First, 4-3-3 does not suit the English. It never has, and it never will. What McClaren is trying to do is beyond me. 3-5-2 against the Croats, and now 4-3-3? Don't change your formation to match your opponent. Stick with what the English do best, the 4-4-2, and make them adapt to you. Second, it's evident that there's something wrong with Frank Lampard when he puts on the England shirt these days. I don't know if he's pressing too much, or perhaps he's being exposed without Makelele behind him, but he's been woeful for England in the past year. Third, don't screw around with the defense! Put four in the back - any four, really, since English defenders are the best in the world - and go with it. Last, without any dynamic dribblers in midfield, England must use speed to overcome that deficiency.
Photos courtesy smh.com.au and yahoo.com. Send in your questions to bookableoffense@gmail.com.
posted by Brian at 11/17/2006 09:15:00 PM 
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